Did I forget anything on the list for Iftar? What am I going to cook for Suhoor? I’m hungry, irritable, and my kids are stressing me out!

Ramadan! One of the most blessed and enjoyable months of the year. But for Muslim sisters, it can also be a month of pressure, extra demands, and anxiety. Many sisters have added pressure of preparing Iftar, taking care of the children as well as trying to find extra time to read Qur’an and perform nawafil acts. Of course, the stress can pile up so begin early and prepare for Ramadan stresses with these 10 helpful tips and ensure a peaceful and serene Ramadan.

1. Read or listen inspiring stories from the Qur’an.

The Qur’an has stories of righteous women who had difficulties but remained patient and received Allah’s reward as a result. Maryam, mother of Isa was accused of immoral acts – she was blessed with a virtuous son who became a noble prophet. Asiya, the wife of Pharoah was tortured viciously by her husband – Allah informed her of her place in Paradise. The mother of Musa gave up her son for a period of time – Allah returned him to her and blessed him to become a righteous prophet. Through their patience, Allah blessed these women with something better than what their trials presented to them.

Stories such as these found in Qur’an are not merely for our reading pleasure. They are words of inspiration to help us through our most difficult challenges in life. As preparation for Ramadan, take up 15 minutes every day to read or listen to a story of these amazing women; when the stressful time of Ramadan approaches, your mind will be set with a positive outlook so you can tackle the busyness with courage and patience learned from these role models.

2. Make extra du’a and memorize them.

Remember to ask Allah to solve your problems and relieve your stressors. He is the One who is in control of everything. In Surah Mujadilah, Allah lets one of the female companions of the Prophet Muhammad know that He hears and knows of her complaints, and He responds to her worries and concerns, as well.

Certainly has Allah heard the speech of the one who argues with you, [O Muhammad], concerning her husband and directs her complaint to Allah. And Allah hears your dialogue; indeed, Allah is Hearing and Seeing. [Surah 58, Verse 1]

We must remember that Allah can make the difficult easy. So recite du’a more frequently to prepare for this month, and while you’re at it, try memorizing them, as well.

According to hadith, the Prophet prescribed the following du’a for stress: O Allah, I hope for Your Mercy, leave me not to myself for even a wink of an eye, and set right all my affairs, there is no god but You.” [Abu Daw’ud]

Allah wants us to seek His help and to plead to Him, so ask Him often for His assistance, especially to help you deal with the coming stresses of Ramadan.

3. Work on becoming more patient.

Make a special effort this Ramadan to intentionally work on becoming more patient and start this now. When we try to be patient, in sha Allah, Allah will make it easier for us to continue.  

The Prophet Muhammad said, “…and whoever remains patient, Allah will make him patient…” [Bukhari]. We should use the difficulties of this blessed month as an opportunity to build our patience.

Here is a du’a from Quran we can make asking Allah to help us to become more patient: “… Our Lord, pour upon us patience and let us die as Muslims [in submission to You].” [Surah 7, Verse 126]

We all need and want Allah to aid us and be with us and being patient is one way of achieving this great blessing, in sha Allah. Unfortunately, patience is not always a natural character trait and the difficulty in practicing it is why it is so rewardable. This month, make a quick note in a private diary/phone app (for example, Notes on iPhone) of the situations in which you did not exercise patience or situations you could have handled better. Having our weaknesses spelled out to us is an effective way for us to actively practice Sabr when similar things happen again.

4. Appreciate an empty stomach.

No doubt, being hungry can make us grumpy and more easily irritated, but having an empty stomach can also, in some respects, make us more calm and subdued. Hunger slows us down and makes us less worldly.  People are more contemplative when fasting. Although the lack of eating can make us irritable, we’re also less energetic and we become more restrained.  We should take advantage of this unique aspect of fasting during our difficult moments and fast Mondays and/or Thursdays until Ramadan begins to prepare us for physical difficulties of Ramadan.

5. Spend extra time with our kids.

One of the greatest stresses mothers experience is the misbehavior of our children. One of the most effective ways of managing misbehavior is by being proactive and spending quality time with our kids. During the first few days of Ramadan, we often wonder what to do with the extra time we have from not eating.  Some of this extra time can be spent playing with our children.

We can engage the kids with a variety of activities during Ramadan, such as reading Islamic stories or playing games like Scrabble or Score Four. Another exciting option is exploring online Islamic stores to find children’s Islamic games that are both entertaining and educational. Additionally, we can collaborate with the kids to design creative Ramadan posters to decorate the house. As we focus on making the season enjoyable, why not search online for some cost-free, creative, and fun games, like guessing games? It’s a wonderful way to shift from stress to joy during this special time. Perhaps you could even discover interesting options related to drift games that align with the festive spirit.

6. Do arts and crafts or hobbies.

One of the best ways for us to feel good about ourselves is to become creative.  Producing useable items that we have produced from hard work makes us feel valuable. We can work on a quilt or make pot pourri with flowers from outside of the home. We can even crochet a kufi or knit a shawl for Eid. These are things that can distract our mind from irritated feelings, makes us feel more composed and is a great way to engage the kids.

7. Give to others.

It is becoming more and more apparent to psychologists and those who work with people who have depression, that one of the best ways for people to feel content is for them to help others less well off than themselves. Women generally have the task of cooking and it is easy to make a small portion extra to give to an elderly neighbor. Stop by their house and help clean the home, shop for them or fulfill some other need they may have. If you know a family that is not doing so well financially, prepare a delicious meal for them and send it over for them to enjoy. The list of charitable deeds is endless and generally doesn’t take a lot of time do to once or twice a week. If you start these deeds now, they will become second nature by the time Ramadan arrives and you rewards will be multiplied!

8. Remind yourself that this is will be a special and fleeting month.

It will only be here for 29 or 30 days. Realize what an enormous blessing you have to increase your good deeds, grow closer to Allah , and hopefully attain a spot in Paradise. The thought of entering paradise someday with endless pleasures that only increase in their joy and have no stresses or difficulties, is likely enough to get you through the harder times of Ramadan. I wish all sisters a peaceful and serene Ramadan!

P.S: Benefited from this article? Join our Productive Ramadan Online Course – a simple, practical and complete blueprint for leading a Productive Ramadan inshaAllah!

The post The Ultimate Guide to Prepare for Ramadan Stress! appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

1. Be Sensitive to Your Child’s Feelings

One of the best ways to avoid future behavioural problems is to be sensitive to your child’s feelings. Let your child know you understand how he feels, even when he has misbehaved. For example, If Abdullah comes home with a notice from school that admonishes him for speaking disrespectfully to his teacher, listen to his story and frustrations first. Let him know that you understand how he feels. Then later you can kindly follow up with instructions on how he should handle the situation in the future more appropriately. At this time, you can also proceed to dispense whatever penalties you deem suitable.

The most effective penalties are those that are implemented with respect and gentleness. Allah says in Qur’an: “So by mercy from Allah, [O Muhammad], you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude [in speech] and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about you. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult them in the matter.” [Qur’an: Chapter 3, Verse 159]

According to hadith, the Prophet said: “Whoever was given his share of gentleness, then he has been given a share of good. And whoever has been prevented from his share of gentleness, then he has been prevented from his share of good.” [Tirmidhi]

2. Use Positive Reinforcement Often

Seek out situations and behaviours in which you can commend your child. For example, when you notice Abdullah getting along with his younger sibling or completing his homework without being told, let him know how pleased you are. Such as, “Abdullah, thank you for cleaning your room without my reminding you to. Your room looks really nice.”

You will often find that encouragement leads to more successful discipline than criticism. Encouragement makes people feel good about themselves, which leads to further effort. Criticism, on the other hand, leads to feelings of despondency, which results in apathy.

3. Give Your Child Control Periodically

We all have a need to be in control of our lives and to feel important. If you find your child becoming increasingly combative and argumentative, give them a say in what goes on in the house. Make sure you provide your children with the opportunity to make their own decisions every now and then. Also, allow them to be in charge of things around the house. For children who have a stronger desire to be in control than others, grant them the extra responsibility. Consider assigning daily chores to your children. This can give them a sense of belonging and purpose. Use an incentive chart to encourage them to complete their chores on occasions they are reticent.

If your child refuses to take a bath when asked to, try offering him or her options rather than commands. For example, “Abdullah, do you want to take your bath now or in ten minutes?” Occasionally, let your child decide what dinner will be for the night or where the family should go for their weekend outing.

4. Be Fair When Disciplining

Being unfair or excessively harsh when correcting your child can sometimes lead to your child retaliating in subtle ways, such as venting his anger on younger siblings or embarrassing you in front of friends and family with disruptive behaviour.

According to hadith, the Prophet said: “Treat your children fairly, treat your children fairly.” [Nasa’i]

Another hadith states that the Prophet said: “Act equally between your children; Act equally between your sons.” [Abu Dawud]

Everyone wants to feel respected and appreciated. Treating your children justly can alleviate a host of discipline problems and helps to make them feel valued. A person who feels valued has the self-respect to adhere to established rules.

If you find you have disciplined excessively or unjustly, let your child know you are sorry. Parents can apologise too. This can teach your child that mistakes in judgment can be corrected. It can also help your child to swallow his resentful feelings that lead to excessively unruly behaviour.

5. Be Conscious of Your Stress Level

If you have been under extra stress lately, realise that your frustrations with your child might be related more to how you are feeling rather than your child’s actual misbehaviour. When you are under added stress, you tend to have less patience. You might snap at your children for things you would not ordinarily scold them about. During these periods, acknowledge your heightened tension and then decrease your stress by retreating to your room for rest. You can also relax by involving yourself in special personal time such as reading an enjoyable book or listening to Qur’an.

6. Be Aware of Your Child’s Stress Level

A child that is stressed out is less likely to be cooperative and more inclined to moodiness. Both of these actions can lead to problem behaviours. If you notice that your child is experiencing added stress, focus on relieving the stress by determining what is upsetting him or her and doing what you can to help alleviate the problems. During these stressful periods, within reason, try to overlook negligible behaviours. Focus more on finding solutions rather than punishment.

Also, keep in mind that one of the best ways of alleviating your child’s stress level is by showing your love and affection.

According to hadith, the Prophet was very loving with his grandchildren. Aisha reported, “Some Bedouin people came to the Prophet and said: ‘Do you kiss your children?’ He said: ‘Yes’. He said: ‘But we, by Allah, never kiss (our children)’. The Prophet said: ‘What can I do if Allah has taken away mercy from you?'” [Ibn Majah]

7. Determine if Your Child is Seeking Attention

Some children will attempt to seek attention in any way they can, even if it is through improper behaviour. Try to spend more time with your child if you know you have been a bit slack lately. Simply listening more and giving your full attention when he or she is talking to you can be a start. But also remember to put aside special time during the day or week to spend with your child. Make it a habit of playing games every Friday or going on outings every Saturday. Arrange a schedule that will be suitable for all family members.

The Prophet was known to spend fun time with his family. According to hadith, Aisha said that while she was on a journey along with the Messenger of Allah , “I had a race with him (the Prophet ) and I outstripped him on my feet. When I became fleshy, (again) I had a race with him (the Prophet) and he outstripped me. He said: This is for that outstripping.”  [Abu Dawud]

Establishing effective discipline techniques in your home can help parents achieve one of the most difficult yet most critical roles of a parent — that of the proper training of their children and in turn, a productive household.

Developing a productive household is an important aspect of establishing a healthy and productive society. Begin striving to improve your household habits in the manner mentioned in the three parts of this series. Be generous and kind, be patient with shortcomings, be committed to an intact family, and most important of all, remain faithful and dedicated to pleasing Your Lord. In sha Allah, you will see a more positive and fruitful home in the future.

If these tips have helped or if you have some more tips to share, let us know in the comments below!

 Read the other parts: (Part 1 | Part 2)

The post [Family Life – Part 3] Tips to Effectively Discipline Your Children appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

This is the second of a series of three articles on having a productive household. In this part, we will discuss 7 more aspects of a productive household. These will relate to how fathers and single mothers can contribute to a more productive household, In sha Allah. (Part 1 | Part 3)

1. Stay Married

One of the most important things a father can do to contribute to a productive household is remain married to his wife. Divorce dissolves families and prevents children from living in the most desirable family atmosphere.

Of course, divorce is allowed in our religion. In some situations such as abusive relationships, it may be preferable. Then there may be situations in which a husband or wife may become widowed. These are exceptions we can not overlook. Nevertheless, in general, the ideal environment for a healthy productive family is an intact one.

According to one hadith, Allah considers divorce the most hated permissible act. The Prophet was reported to have said: “The most hateful permissible thing (halal) in the sight of Allah is divorce.” [Ibn Majah]

Divorce causes difficulties for all parties involved. The most obvious harm occurs when the partners have children. Divorce shakes the foundation of what children know to be familiar and stable. The children are forced into a situation that causes them extreme grief and uncertainty. They lose trust in those closest and most dear to them, often times becoming emotionally insecure.

Even without children, the two divorced individuals themselves suffer great anxiety, emotional upheaval and psychological trauma. Divorce frequently leads to the development of a host of uncomfortable and unhealthy feelings and interactions from the former partners. Divorced spouses often feel betrayed, they lose trust in others and they can fall into long-term depression. This emotional devastation affects the individuals’ interactions with others, including their future relationships. The effects of divorce can sometimes be suffered throughout life.

According the American Psychological Association, “… about 40 to 50 per cent of married couples in the United States divorce.” This is not a precedent we wish to establish for our children.

Children should be raised in intact households. This is obvious, yet much easier said than done, of course. Couples should look to fulfil their responsibilities rather than demanding their rights, then Allah may bless them. Remember that Qur’an and the sunnah have the best advice on how to sustain a working marriage. Additionally, to aid in achieving intact productive households, parents should take advantage of the other resources. Some of these include counselling (recommended in Qur’an), books, websites and suggestions from relatives and friends from whom we may gain helpful advice and encouragement.

2. Support the Children

Of course, this world is not perfect. Sometimes, families break up. In these situations, it is extremely important that the father remains an important part of the children’s life and provide child support. Divorce can bring about extremely intense feelings between former spouses. For the children’s sake, a father should not let the estrangement affect the relationship he has with them. The children still desire to be with both parents. They need both parents. Each fulfils a different need that is necessary for the children’s proper development.

In addition, children of divorce can sometimes feel abandoned when one parent chooses to avoid interacting with them after the divorce. This can lead to the children having low self esteem and projecting this self image upon society through violence, disrespecting others and displaying self-destructive behaviours. This behavior should be treated with ARC training trauma therapy as soon as it is  diagnosed. For these reasons, it is important for husbands to be there for their children, despite the difficulty and discomfort they may experience during and after divorce. 

3. Fathers Should be Kind to Children’s Mother

It is often the mother whom children are most attached to. Let your children see your affection towards their mother. This gives them peace of mind and teaches them how to treat their own wife once they mature.

Do not abuse your wife. Allah has recommended other methods to use rather than hitting. How many husbands truly attempt to put into practice these recommendations given by Allah ? Anger-management problems, low-self esteem, arrogance and lack of knowledge of conflict management are often the true reasons for physical abuse in the home.

The Prophet never used physical discipline with any of his wives. He is the best of examples for us to emulate.

He also said: “The most perfect man in his faith among the believers is the one whose behaviour is most excellent; and the best of you are those who are the best to their wives.” [At-Tirmidhi]

The above hadith says it all when it comes to the husband’s treatment of his wife.

4. Be Kind With the Children

The Messenger said: “Indeed among the believers with the most complete faith is the one who is the best in conduct, and the most kind to his family.” [At-Tirmidhi]

It has become a norm in some households for the father to be a stern disciplinarian. This is nothing further from the way in which the Prophet was known to run his household. Not only should fathers be kind and gentle with their spouse, but also with their children.

Abu Hurairah reported: The Prophet kissed his grandson Hasan bin ‘Ali in the presence of Aqra’ bin Habis. Thereupon Aqra’ remarked: “I have ten children and I have never kissed any one of them.” The Messenger of Allah cast a glance upon him and said, “He who does not show mercy to others, will not be shown mercy.” [Bukhari and Muslim]

There is no reference to Prophet ever hitting any of his children, stepchildren or grandchildren. What he was known for was kissing them, saying he loved them and being exceptionally patient with them. This is the best model for fathers who wish to establish productive households.

5. Spending Time Productively

Just as some fathers may find themselves divorced or widowed due to unfortunate life situations, so too may mothers. Running a productive household as a single parent can be challenging. One of the greatest difficulties is finding the time to do everything needed and maintaining proper care of your child without the other spouse in the home. An idle mind can get involved in numerous improper activities.

One way to help your children with the extra time they have when you are not around is by involving them in extracurricular activities. Look into after-school programs at your masjid or even with mothers who home school their children. If your child is in his or her teens, local parks and recreation centers sometimes provide sports activities in which your child can get involved. I remember a time when I was researching various activities and came across information about 카지노사이트. This led me to think about the importance of engaging children in wholesome activities to keep them occupied constructively. Schools can sometimes provide extracurricular activities as well.

6. Be Okay with Reaching out

Another way to help you become more productive in the home is for single mothers to use other family members to give you a break and provide support. Extended family members can provide mentoring and emotional stability to help your children thrive in a more enriching environment.

Male relatives may be available to teach your son fishing or simple car mechanics. Female relatives might be able to share knitting and needlework with your daughter. If you have extended family members living in the same household, this can be a true blessing. Let Grandma help out while you are away at work or when you need some quality time for yourself.

7. Trust and Have Faith in Allah

Let your children see you depending on Allah in all realms of your life, including work. Allah says: “Put your trust in Allah if you are believers indeed.” [Qur’an: Chapter 5, Verse 23]

We all depend on Allah for our sustenance. It is easy to forget where our true maintenance is coming from when we have a secure job or we are being supported by our spouse. Remembering to depend upon Allah is essential, especially for single mothers who are struggling to maintain their households.

One problem affecting many single mothers is finding employment, while trying to maintain their proper Islamic dress. Do not feel you have to compromise your modest dress to obtain an acceptable job. Your modest dress is a protection for you and it allows you to present a proper role model for your daughters and sons. If an employer will not hire you due to your dress code, then you are better off working somewhere else.

One can find numerous stories of sisters who removed their hijab to get a job and were still unable to find employment, then returned to wearing hijab and Allah provided them with decent jobs.

Opportunities for employment can be found in Islamic institutions as well as secular establishments which purposely seek out diversity among their employees. A closed door to opportunity is often an indication that a more favorable prospect exists elsewhere.

Our next and final part of this three-part series will discuss successful ways of disciplining your children more effectively without hitting or shouting.

Are you a single-parent? How do you run your household and what are some of your tips? Share them in the Comments section below.

 Read the other parts: (Part 1 | Part 3)

The post [Family Life – Part 2] Tips for Single-Parent Households appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

What is one of the greatest accomplishments one can achieve that produces a benefit for the individual, his family and the community at large? According to sites like https://www.konnectbuilding.com.au, it is the realization of a happy, peaceful, and productive household.

Although having a productive household is one of the most fulfilling and beneficial aspects of this life, it is often neglected as a goal to aspire towards. One is indeed remiss in failing to make a happy and content household a primary goal. It is well known that strong productive families are the foundation of healthy civilizations. Sound families are also what help make individuals within families healthy mentally and emotionally. It is quite apparent that a productive household is one of the primary goals one should wish to attain. It should also be an ambition towards which one directs his or her children as they mature.

What are some of the ways in which you can achieve a happy productive household? Here are 7 ways you can start today!

1. Put Allah First in Your Life

If you do not have a good relationship with Allah , you will not have a healthy relationship with your family members. Allah tells us how to behave with one another. The Prophet tells and shows us how to behave with one another. If we do not fear Allah and have the hope for His reward, we will have little motivation to do some of the prescribed recommendations from Qur’an and Sunnah, which contribute to a more enjoyable household. This is particularly the case when the requirements or suggestions do not suit our personal goals or interests.

Putting Allah first in your life empowers you to think of every situation in the context of His guidance and in terms of the akhira. This means you pick your battles wisely, behave with tolerance and seek to understand before being understood.

2. Be Forgiving

Allah says in Quran:

“Whoever pardons and makes reconciliation — his reward is [due] from Allah.” [Qur’an: Chapter 42, Verse 40]

“… and let them pardon and overlook. Would you not like that Allah should forgive you?” [Qur’an: Chapter 24, Verse 22]

The ones who can hurt you the most are your loved ones. They are the ones to whom your heart is attached and you are closest. Because of this close relationship, you expect and desire more from them than you would from distant acquaintances or strangers. For these reasons, when you are slighted by a loved one, the pain is more severe. However, when you keep in mind that your forgiveness of their mistakes is not for them, but for you, by gaining Allah ’s pleasure and your reward from Him, the task of forgiving becomes much easier.

Maintaining a forgiving disposition enhances your productivity because you prevent your mind from becoming a war zone for past slights.

3. Smile Often Around Your Family

Jarir bin Abdullah said: The Messenger of Allah never refused me permission to see him since I embraced Islam and never looked at me except with a smile (on his face). [Bukhari]

According to hadith, the Prophet also said: “When you smile to your brother’s face, it is charity.” [Tirmidhi]

How do you feel when you see someone smiling at you? Does it make you want to smile back at them? Does it put you in a better mood? Does it soften your heart some? One of the simplest ways to make your home more productive is by putting on a cheerful face. Why not make your home an elegant and an astonishing place with the help of some experts like the ones at Archute!

Of course, this can certainly be harder to do at times, particularly when there are unresolved problems and uncomfortable tension in the home, but the greater the difficulty, the greater the reward. Keep this simple heart softener in mind.

By smiling, you can “trick” your brain into feeling content — and contentment enhances productivity. In addition, smiling is infectious — so you automatically improve the general mood of your entire household by this simple act.

4. Cook Homemade Meals

You may be wondering what cooking has to do with a productive household. Well, it is not the cooking act itself. It is what is associated with cooking a meal and what accompanies a home-cooked meal. Think back on when you were young. Do you recall your mother’s or your grandmother’s homemade dishes? Do you remember them cooking your favourite dessert or dinner? Do you remember smelling their fresh baked bread, cake or cookies?

Food has an effect on all five of our senses. We nurture others with food. When you cook a delicious meal for your family, they have something enjoyable to look forward to. They have something pleasurable to participate in once the meal is complete. When you cook meals for your family, you are demonstrating your care and love for them.

5. Avoid Getting Angry

According to hadith, the Messenger said: “The strong man is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling); rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry.” [Ahmad]

If there is a main ingredient that contributes to lack of productivity in the home, expressing one’s anger might be it. When one is angry, he loses his sense of rationale. He may spurt hurtful words, abuse others physically or even kill loved ones. And in the aftermath, once Shaitan has fled, he is filled with regrets. Avoid making your household a house of horrors, by taking heed of the Prophet’s  suggestions on how to alleviate anger.

According to hadith, the Prophet said: “I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said “I seek refuge with Allah from the Shaytan,” what he feels (i.e., his anger) would go away.” [Tirmidhi]

Additionally: “If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.” [Al-Albani]

Also the Messenger of Allah said: “If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down.” [Al-Albani]

6. Be Patient With Your Family’s Imperfections

One of the best ways to help you avoid becoming angry with your family members is by being patient with their imperfections. Not one of us on Earth is perfect. We all have our faults. Our children sometimes talk disrespectfully to us. Our womenfolk may not dress as modestly as they should. Television, movies, and the computer present countless inappropriate images and examples to which family members are continually exposed and misguided. Keeping this in mind can help us avoid reacting brusquely with our family when they err. Instead, we can direct them toward proper behaviour through our own example and by gentle reminders. The rewards of struggling to be patient are enormous.

“You who believe! Endure and be more patient… and fear Allah, so that you may be successful.” [Qur’an: Chapter 3, Verse 200]

“Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full, without reckoning.” [Qur’an: Chapter 39, Verse 10]

“And be patient. Surely, Allah is with those who are patient.” [Qur’an: Chapter 8, Verse 46]

The one who practices patience with his family will be rewarded for his restraint. Allah will also be with him, and who better to have as a helper in this world? Having the ability to be patient and acting on this restraint is one of the greatest blessings from Allah .

Being patient aids your productivity by putting a lid on rough emotions, maintaining peaceful ties, and also by providing a form of spiritual purification.

7. Make Dua for Your Family

The above points are all helpful in helping us attain a happy and productive household. However, we must always remember that all success comes from Allah . It is crucial that we remember to ask Allah to bless us with a happy and loving family. He has power over all things.

Every family has its own unique situation with family members and circumstances. So of course, each of us will have our own distinct dua to make to Allah for our families. However, Allah has given us general dua from Qur’an that we can make for our family as well. Here are some of these duas:

“Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders of the Muttaqun.” [Qur’an: Chapter 25, Verse 74]

“O my Lord! Grant me from You, a good offspring. You are indeed the All-Hearer of invocation.” [Qur’an: Chapter 3, Verse 38]

“O my Lord! Make this city (Makkah) one of peace and security, and keep me and my sons away from worshipping idols.” [Qur’an: Chapter 14, Verse 35]

“O my Lord! Make me one who performs As-Salat (Iqamat-as-Salat ) and (also) from my offspring, our Lord! And accept my invocation. [Qur’an: Chapter 14, Verse 40]

Also, the Prophet used to say for his grandsons Hassan and Hussein:

“I seek refuge for you two with Allah’s perfect words from every Shaytan (devil) and poisonous creature and every evil eye.” [Bukhari]

May Allah bless us all to achieve one of the greatest blessings, achievements and goals of this world: A happy productive household!

The next article will cover 7 more helpful tips that can help make your home happier, more peaceful and more productive, In sha Allah.

Which of these tips have you found to be most effective? Which ones do you struggle with? Let us know in the Comments section below!

Read the other parts: (Part 2 | Part 3)

The post [Family Life – Part 1] Tips on Building a Productive Muslim Household appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

1. Establish Respectful Discipline Methods

Determine how to handle misbehavior and incomplete class work and homework assignments. Many teachers eagerly confide that often the greatest difficulty with teaching is managing behavior rather than teaching the material itself.

Knowing effective ways of managing your child’s misbehavior can help simplify the teaching process significantly. If you can get your child to cease talking, sit in his seat and follow along with your instructions, you will have accomplished a major part of your teaching job. There are many ways to respectfully encourage your child to comply with your directives. One remarkable way is delaying an exciting and desirable activity until the end of the class period or end of the day.

Let’s say you are teaching a science class and part of the lesson is to collect an assortment of leaves from outside. Children generally enjoy participating in outdoor activities. Remind your child that if he stays seated throughout the lesson and follows along in class, the two of you will be able to complete class a few minutes early and go outside to gather the leaves. Perchance he periodically still needs reminding, let him know, casually, that whenever you have to stop the lesson to correct him, this takes away from the extra time you two might have. This discipline technique not only encourages appropriate conduct, it also teaches your child to self-manage his own behavior. You accomplish two goals in one!

It is reported the Prophet said, “Allah did not send me to be harsh or cause harm, but he sent me to teach and make things easy.” [Sahih Muslim]

2. Avoid Reinventing the Wheel

If you are a novice and a bit nervous about taking on the admirable job of homeschooling your child, take the easy route when starting out. Although some parents prefer designing their own learning materials for teaching, this may not be the best solution for you. There is an abundance of educational materials you can purchase for teaching most areas of study.

Educational materials including student texts and teacher’s editions ranging from arithmetic to science can be purchased online from academic textbook companies. There are publishers that specialize in educational materials for kindergarten through 12th grade. The fantastic thing about these companies is that you can purchase the student edition as well as the teacher’s edition. The teacher’s edition, of course, provides answers for your ease in teaching. But they also provide you with an assortment of lesson plans, teaching techniques, and extracurricular activities you can use when teaching your children. This can be invaluable when trying to manage on your own.

Alhamdulillah, you can even find Islamic learning materials for a variety of subjects. Susan Douglass has a book collection for grades kindergarten through six. The set provides a great selection of Islamic-based stories that include reading comprehension questions and lesson correlated activities. The titles can be found under Islamic School Book. Another fine educational selection is the Emaan Reading Series by Dr Abu Ameenah Bilal Philips. This compilation of 58 paperback books provides wonderfully colorful and entertaining stories for children 6 through 9 years of age. The excellent aspect of these readers is that the vocabulary is specifically designed to be age appropriate.

If you are still a little queasy about starting your homeschooling journey, here is an even simpler way than searching out and purchasing your own materials: join a homeschooling program online or in your area. You will get the moral support you need, and some programs even provide you with free materials! How about that for ease?

If the Prophet had a choice between two halal things, he would pick the easier one. [Sahih Bukhari]

3. Don’t Overschedule

In an effort to provide your child with an optimum educational experience you might be inclined to bite off more than you can chew. Keep in mind that even public schools rotate certain classes periodically as opposed to scheduling them daily. Avoid attempting to schedule every subject into a single day. You will likely run yourself ragged – if you are even able to accomplish this feat in the first place. Your primary lessons should be reading, writing and arithmetic — those age-old subjects.

Here is a tip for history lessons and the sciences if you find little time to teach these subjects: check out books on these subjects from the juvenile section of the library for your child to read for pleasure, homework or extra credit. These books are often easy-reading and more entertaining than school texts, and your child will still be exposed to the material.

4. Realize You Can’t Do it All

Homeschooling is a full-time job… so is maintaining a home. Realize that the kitchen may not remain sparkling clean, clothes might pile up, and dinner may not be ready on time, or at all. On occasion, try opting for meals that are less time consuming but still healthy: yogurt fruit salad; oatmeal, fruit and nuts; sandwiches and smoothies. Be sure to discuss with your spouse ahead of time your concerns, and his, about your time management issues while homeschooling.

One option you might consider is having the kids help out more around the house. Explain to them that you need extra help now that you are homeschooling. Create a schedule of chores you need help with and designate certain children to be responsible for them. Some parents are uncomfortable with the quality of housework their children perform. They feel it is easier to do it themselves or not have it done at all, and that is fine, too. Everyone has his or her own comfort level.

5. Appreciate Your Assets

Often times homeschooling parents consider their own abilities inferior to teachers in standard schools. Try minimizing these comparisons. There are many factors that make a great teacher. And there are just as many factors that contribute to children learning better. One important point educators tend to agree on is that children learn best when they feel secure and accepted. What better environment than one’s own home can these two attributes be felt?

This is not to say you should not continue educating yourself in ways of improving your teaching abilities. We should always seek to become the best we can. Browse the internet for helpful teaching techniques you can use with your child. Improve certain academic skills, if need be. Contact home school organizations to gain personal assistance in your job as a homeschooling parent. Attempting to improve your abilities will help you feel more secure in your role as a homeschooling mom.

6. Welcome the Opportunity

Last, but not least, realize that homeschooling your child provides you with great leverage in fashioning his thinking and perspective of the world. You can address class lessons from an Islamic perspective. You are free to teach your child that Allah is completely in control of everything in the world — the movement of the stars, the setting of the sun, the orbiting of the moon. You can explain to your child the harms and ills of today’s society. You can protect your child from feeling inferior to those who deride him for not conforming to their way. In essence, you have the opportunity to, In sha Allah, raise your child up as a slave of Allah .

“O You who believe, save yourself and your families from Hell-fire, whose fuel are humans and stones.” [Qur’an: Chapter 66, Verse 6]

In sha Allah, these tips will help those who are homeschooling their children or simply need pointers for incorporating education into home life. If you have any other ideas or suggestions for homeschooling, let me know in the comment section below!

The post The Road to Homeschool Success appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

“Did you do your homework?” Sound familiar? Well, it is that time of year again – school books, pencils, homework, and report cards… school is back in. If you think one of the most challenging aspects of the school year is getting your kids to do their homework timely and regularly, you are not alone. But do not fret… there is hope! Here are several things you can do to make homework time less stressful and more enjoyable this year, In sha Allah. 

Initial Checks  

The first thing you want to do is rule out if your child has a learning disability. Some kids do not want to do their homework because they have special learning challenges. These children may need additional instruction or one-on-one help. Take your child to SENCO consultation services to assess their learning abilities. Your child’s teacher should be able to help you determine if your child has a learning disability.

Reward  

If a learning disability is not causing your child’s lackluster homework performance, try offering him something that will be an incentive to do his homework. Using an Incentive Chart is one of the best ways to motivate your child to do something he has little desire doing.

Of course, incentive charts and rewarding children for proper behaviour have become a controversial issue as of recent. Some are of the opinion that rewarding your child for good behaviour can send the wrong message. They feel that children should behave properly simply because this is the suitable thing to do. They also contend that it can make a child dependent upon being rewarded whenever they are encouraged to behave properly. There is validity in all of these points. However, throughout the Qur’an Allah reminds us often of the reward we will receive for being righteous and obeying His laws.

“But those who heed their Lord will have Gardens through which rivers flow, to live in forever as a welcome from Allah. What is with Allah is better for those who are truly good.” [Qur’an: Chapter 3, Verse 198]

“But whoever comes to Him as a believer having done righteous deeds – for those will be the highest degrees [in position]:” [Qur’an: Chapter 20, Verse 75]

Adults with their full mental faculties receive encouragement from Allah to obey His rulings. Children, who are of less sound mind, can benefit from incentives, as well.

Make a Star Chart

One of the simplest incentive programs is the Star Chart system. It is really quite easy to set up. When you set up your Star Chart system, explain the new program to your child prior to implementing it. Let him know you have found a fun new way to help him do his homework. Get a blank sheet of paper and write your child’s name at the top. Inform him that each day he completes his homework on time, he gets a star. Let him know that after he earns 10 stars, he gets a special treat. Then the two of you brainstorm different places he would like to go or toys he would like you to purchase or some other special activity he would like to participate in.

Keep in mind the reward need not be expensive or lavish. Maybe he would like to have his friends over to spend the night. Ensure the selection of rewards is what you are willing to follow through on. Then post the star chart and list of rewards where your child can view them often. The refrigerator or bedroom door are good places where he will see them often as a reminder.

Some parents prefer using more elaborate charts to help their child feel how special the Star Chart system is. Ready-made colourful charts can be purchased at school supply stores and some department stores in the stationary section. You can also design your own star chart with colourful pictures, fancy drawings or adhesive stickers to make the program initially more exciting. This can be a special activity for you and your child to work on together. It can make the chart even more special, because it allows you and your child to participate in an enjoyable activity together.

Each day your son does his homework, place a star on his chart. Be sure to let him know he has a star when you put it up. The days your son neglects completing his homework, remove a star at the end of the day. If he does not have stars to remove, put up a check. Checks are used with the Star Chart system and should be explained to your child as well. They are given when your son fails to complete his homework for the day. Make sure you let him know he has a star off (or check) for not doing his homework.

Avoid squabbling with your child over his failure to complete his homework. Let the stars and checks speak for you, instead. If your son gets 6 checks, deprive him of a privilege he enjoys. You can take away the computer for 1, 2, or 3 days (depending on age); take away his outside playtime, or whatever you deem he would dislike giving up.

Keep in mind that every set of 10 stars earns a reward. Once a set of 10 has been earned, the individual stars from that 10 cannot be removed.

Incentive Ideas  

Here are some rewards you can use for your star chart:

• Outings
• Small toys
• Friends over
• Slumber party
• Special dessert
• Help mom cook
• Play game with mom
• Bubble bath
• Select menu for dinner
• Mom helps with a chore
• Get a dollar
• Extra time on computer
• Extra TV time
• Extra time on video game
• Take a walk with mom
• Remove six checks from the chart

Disincentive Ideas Here are a few ideas you can use for penalties:

• Less or no computer time
• Less or no TV time
• Less or no video game time
• No outing
• Pay money
• 100 jumping jacks
• 20 push-ups
• Clean house
• Fold clothes
• Wash dishes
• Stay in room for time out (1 minute per year in age)
• Write standards
• Go to bed early

Keep in mind, some children may defensively make comments such as “I don’t care about stars anyway!” or “So what?” Ignore these comments and continue with the program.

Do not give up on the Star Chart system. It is a remarkable discipline method that brings amazing results. Keep up the good work, and you are sure to see success, In sha Allah.

Using the Star Chart system for homework is a marvelous way to help you and your child become more productive this school year. Children no longer have to listen to constant nagging from parents. Parents are able to inspire good homework habits by using gentle encouragement instead of harsh enforcement. This makes homework time more pleasurable for both parent and child.

Now you are all set with a golden key for a productive school year of homework with you and your child. Share your experience with the Star Chart system in the comments section below.  

The post A Golden Key to Successful Homework Completion appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

What!? You shift around to glance at your 6-year-old. You give him a heavy stare and then ask again, “What did you say?” He repeats the word again with the casualness of a morning greeting. Your 6-year-old just blurted a word of profanity!

How do you handle this delicate situation? Well, there are several things you can do to discourage your child from saying bad words. Here are 6 productive ways to get started:

1.Try to determine if older family members, friends, or TV viewing are providing your child with the improper words he is using. Young children are excellent mimickers. If they are hearing inappropriate words from those they regularly interact with, you might have a continuous battle trying to get them to stop using the words themselves. If you conclude they are getting the words from others around them, attempt to limit your child’s contact with these sources and mention your concerns to the individuals, as well.

Abu Hurairah reported: The Prophet  said, “A man utters a word pleasing to Allah without considering it of any significance for which Allah exalts his ranks (in Jannah); another one speaks a word displeasing to Allah without considering it of any importance, and for this reason he will sink down into Hell.” [Bukhari]

2. Explain to your child that the words he is using are not good words and that he is a Muslim, and Muslims should use decent words. Teach him the hadith in which The Prophet (saw) said: Whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him say good or remain silent.” [Muslim]
Mention this hadith to your child often, not only during times of flagrantly ill speech, but also when he calls his friends and siblings hurtful names.

3. Provide your child with alternative words to use when he uses inappropriate words of a lower grade than profanity. Tell him instead of using “, say “uninformed”. Instead of saying I hate Jamal, say Jamal “irritates” me. Children take pleasure in learning new words and phrases.

4. When you hear your child using proper words, compliment his behavior. One way of showing your child you are pleased with his pleasant words is by using incentive charts. Simply place a star on your child’s chart whenever he uses good words instead of negative words. When he reaches a certain number of stars such as ten, give him a special treat. Incentive charts work wonders! Acknowledging your child’s proper speech will go a long way toward encouraging him to use suitable words in the future, In sha Allah.

The Prophet  said, “When the son of Adam gets up in the morning, all the limbs humble themselves before the tongue and say: ‘Fear Allah for our sake because we are with you: (i.e., we will be rewarded or punished as a result of what you do) if you are straight, we will be straight; and if you are crooked, we will become crooked.”‘ [Tirmidhi]

5. If the words aren’t exceedingly objectionable, try ignoring your child when he uses distasteful words. Sometimes kids go through phases with offensive words. They use them for a while then switch to others. Although the words ‘stupid’, ‘crazy’, and ‘dumb’ aren’t nice words, they aren’t profanity. It can become a chore following every single improper word your child uses.

However the following verse from the Qur’an is a great reminder for your child: O you who believe! let not (one) people laugh at (another) people perchance they may be better than they, nor let women (laugh) at (other) women, perchance they may be better than they; and do not find fault with your own people nor call one another by nicknames; evil is a bad name after faith, and whoever does not turn, these it is that are the unjust. [Qur’an: Chapter 49, Verse 11]

6. Set a good example for your child. When you speak to or about others, use pleasant words. Let your children hear good words flowing from your mouth on a regular basis. In the long run, this might be the most productive way of taming your child’s foul mouth.

Abu Musa Al-Ash’ari reported: I asked the Messenger of Allah : “Who is the most excellent among the Muslims?” He said, “One from whose tongue and hands the other Muslims are secure.”  [Muslim]

Share any tips you might have in the Comments section below.

The post 6 Productive Tips to Tame Your Child’s Foul Mouth appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

“Amongst all those women who ride camels (i.e. Arabs), the ladies of Quraish are the best. They are merciful and kind to their off-spring . . . ” [Sahih Bukhari]

How do you plan to improve yourself this Ramadan? Ramadan is a time when we seek to grow closer to Allah and attain as many good deeds as possible. We also strive to better ourselves and make improvements in our character in general. Have you ever wished you had not followed up your daughter’s back talk with your own ill-mannered retort? Have you ever wanted to respond to your son’s messy room with an instructive response rather than a furious rant? Well how about working on improving some of those skills this Ramadan along with your other endeavors? Here are 5 productive ways to improve your parenting skills this Ramadan.

1. Give Attention: We all enjoy a little attention every now and then. . . . so do our children. Children do not only enjoy it, they thrive on it. Make sure you give your child your time during this special month. Although you will be focusing on extra prayers, reading Quran, and other forms of worship, involve your child in some of these activities as well. Encourage your child to pray with you when you offer salat. When you are reading the Qur’an, have your little one sit on your lap and explain using your native language and simpler terms about the meaning. And of course, kids love the kitchen. Let your child help out with some of the dishes you’ll be cooking for iftar.

2. Find Alternatives to Hitting: This month when your daughter talks back to you or slaps her little brother, find an alternative way of correcting her behavior than your usual smacking or shouting. These may be the easiest and most common methods of correcting your child, but that does not mean they are superior methods. There are numerous effective ways of getting your child to comply or change her behavior without hitting or shouting at her. One remarkable method is by using incentive charts. When your daughter talks to you in a respectful tone even though she is upset with you, place a star on her chart to show you acknowledge her effort. After she receives 10 stars, cook her favorite dessert, buy her a small token gift, or allow her an extra hour on the computer. These are just examples of rewards for favorable behavior. Brain storm more ideas . . .  or better yet, allow your daughter to think up rewards she would like.

3. Be a Good Example: One of the best ways of directing your child towards proper behavior is by being a good model of proper behavior yourself. Be respectful towards others in and away from home. Avoid ranting when you are upset during problematic situations. Refuse to hit when you’re angry. Make salat on time. Remember Allah often in your speech and actions. Mention Allah regularly in your home. When your children see you behaving in an admirable manner, it gives them the incentive to do too.If you want your daughter to refrain from hitting her younger brother when he uses her markers, let her see a pattern of behavior from you in which you avoid hitting when correcting others. Let her see you use alternatives. This will give her alternatives to select from, as well.

4. Practice Patience: Being patient when you are frustrated or displeased with your child’s behavior can be hard to do, but well worth the effort. Being patient helps you avoid doing or saying inappropriate things to your child that you might later regret. It also helps you model appropriate behaviors for your child to imitate.

5. Model after the Prophet : Learn ways in which the Prophet behaved around children. He was kind, compassionate, and known to avoid using physical discipline with the young around him. He was also very tolerant of children’s behavior. Here are a few examples of how gentle the Prophet was with his young family members: one hadith illustrates his kindness when he kissed his grandson Hussein. Another shows his patience when he allowed his grandson Hasan to climb on his back and neck while prostrating during salat!  And here’s a hadith that says it all:Anas ibn Maalik said, “I served the Prophet for ten years, and he never said to me, “Uf” (a minor harsh word denoting impatience) and never blamed me by saying, “Why did you do so or why didn’t you do so?”” [Sahih Bukhari]

May Allah bless us all to be become better Muslims this Ramadan. May He bless us to become better parents and bless all our children to grow up as good Muslims.

P.S: Benefited from this article? Join our Productive Ramadan Online Course – a simple, practical and complete blueprint for leading a Productive Ramadan inshaAllah!

The post 5 Productive Ways to Improve Your Parenting Skills this Ramadan appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

Spending productive time with our children is essential to raising them up properly. It is related that the Prophet said:

“All of you are shepherds, and each one is responsible for his flock. A leader is a shepherd and he is responsible for those in his care. A man is a shepherd over his family, and he is responsible for his flock. A woman is like a shepherd over her husband’s house and children, and she is responsible for them. And a slave is a guardian of his master’s property and is responsible for it. So all of you are guardians and are responsible for your charges” [Sunan Abi Dawud].

We don’t often experience the sight of shepherds guiding their sheep across a meadow to graze. But anyone who has seen the image of a young man with staff in hand and a flock of sheep trailing behind can attest to the fact that the proper maintenance of one’s flock necessitates the spending of time.

Here are five tips on how mothers can be more productive when spending time with their kids:

1. Talk to your child.

Mothers have a myriad of responsibilities to perform throughout the day. We prepare meals, wash and fold laundry, clean the house, transport to and from school — the list goes on and on. During some of these activities, however, we have the opportunity to do a bit of multi-tasking and connect with our kids.

The next time you pick up your daughter from school and commute back home, ask her about how her day went in school, who her friends are, or who her favorite teacher is. Back at home while folding the clothes or putting the dishes away, discuss with your young one what you accomplished during the day and what still remains to be done.

Make it a point to be accessible to your child when she approaches you with a concern that she has. Of course, during your daily routine of chores and errands, you won’t always be able or willing to provide your child with attentive conversation. Do the best you can. And do make a conscious effort to meet your child eye-to-eye to show your interest.

When your child approaches you during the day to tell you about something important that’s on her mind, use that as an opportunity to carry the conversation further and instill some of your values, or to simply lend an affectionate ear.

2. Listen to your child.

Take the time to sincerely listen to your child express her complaints, concerns, and happy moments. This helps build a needed bond between you and your young one. Children need to feel they have a significant individual who is concerned about their needs, wants, and problems. Showing concern for your child’s emotional state helps her develop healthy social skills for interacting with others around her.

3. Take your child on outings.

Spending time with your child away from home does not require much planning, time, or money. The places to take your child are endless:

• Take her on a short excursion with you to the mailbox at the street corner to deliver a letter. This will help her develop a greater understanding of the postal process—but more importantly, it will show that you enjoy her company.
• Let her join you on your trip to the gas station to pump gas in the car, where you might even find vintage gas station signs for sale. These signs can be a delightful discovery, offering a unique piece of history and a chance to own a nostalgic artifact that adds charm and character to any collection or decor.
• Take her along with you to go shopping for groceries.
• Discover new things at the museum.
• Enjoy a walk to the park or playtime at the playground with bespoke designs and markings like the ones at bestplaygroundmarkings.co.uk. And for the wetpour repair, contact an expert now! For playgrounds equipped with high-quality equipment and designs, consider visiting reputable sources like Playground Designs for optimal assistance!
• Take a stroll through the mall.

You are your child’s center of attention; let your little one know you desire to be around her as well. If you want to encourage creative play, markings from playgroundmarkings.org.uk like a road map or a city layout can stimulate imaginative and cooperative play among children. You may also build an indoor playroom with Themed Soft Play Creations that your kids will enjoy.

4. Discipline respectfully and kindly.

When you correct your child for misbehavior, be gentle in doing so. It is reported that the Prophet said,

“O Ayesha! There is nothing that has gentleness in it except that it beautifies it, and it is not taken away from anything except that it defiles it” [Muslim].

Often times, a gentle approach of explaining to your child her error is sufficient. Better yet, reward her for the times she behaves appropriately.  When she remembers to take her bath without a reminder, let her know you are pleased by giving her a special hug or kiss. When she shares with her younger sibling, tell her Allah likes that type of behavior and let her have extra time on the computer before bedtime. Your daughter will learn that even though she isn’t perfect, she does have positive aspects about her behavior. This feeling of accomplishment will spur further appropriate conduct in the future, insha’Allah.

5. Be patient with your child.

Allah says in Quran,

“And verily, whosoever shows patience and forgives, that would truly be from the things recommended by Allah” [42:43].

Remaining patient with your child’s shortcomings is an honorable act that you should strive to make a habit of. When you refrain from saying hurtful words and avoid lashing out angrily when your child misbehaves, you present a living example for your child to model after. One of the primary ways we teach our children is through example. When they observe how we handle difficult situations, they learn how they should handle them, too.

All of these tips on how to spend productive time with your child necessitate being there for them. Quality time is important, but quantity time is as well. Being a shepherd is an enormous responsibility. Make a conscious effort to spend productive time with your child regularly. On the Day of Judgment we will be asked about how we spent our time. Spending it productively on our children is a valuable way to get blessings from Allah, insha’Allah, and a wonderful way to maintain our flock.

The post 5 Tips to Spending Productive Time with Your Kids appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.

You, as an involved parent, encourage your children to fast during the blessed month of Ramadan every year. But there is another exceptional month of the year in which the first 10 days are more blessed than any of the days of Ramadan – the first 10 days of Dhul-Hijjah!

The Prophet said:

“There are no days in which righteous deeds are more beloved to Allah than these ten days.” The people asked, “Not even jihad for the sake of Allah?” He said, “Not even jihad for the sake of Allah, except in the case of a man who went out to fight giving himself and his wealth up for the cause, and came back with nothing” [Bukhari].

This year, the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah will come upon us not long after the beginning of our children’s school year. Even with the hustle and bustle of school and the constant demands upon a busy mother and her children, you can still seek to increase your reward from Allah. The following are 6 simple and productive ways you and your children can attempt to gain Allah’s pleasure during the first 10 days of Dhul-Hijjah, while maintaining your daily routine:

1. Remember Allah’s name upon your tongue often:

During these special 10 days, we are encouraged to dhikr frequently.  According to one hadith by Abdullah ibn Umar, the Prophet said:

“There are no days greater in the sight of Allah and in which righteous deeds are more beloved to Him than these ten days, so during this time recite a great deal of Tahleel (“La ilaaha ill-Allaah”), Takbeer (“Allahu Akbar”) and Tahmeed. (“Al-hamdu Lillaah”)”[Ahmed].

When you remember and mention Allah’s praises, do it audibly so your children can hear and catch on to the phrases over time, insha’Allah.

2. Encourage your children to listen to Quran:

If you and your children are unable to find suitable time to read as much Quran as you’d like, try the next best thing—listen to it. These days you can listen to Quran almost anywhere and from a variety of sources; you can listen to CDs and cassette tapes, or from computers, phones and iPads. And, you can listen to Quran during almost any activity you perform in the house or outside, including cooking, cleaning, resting, dining, driving, etc. If you don’t understand Arabic, be sure to make an effort to listen to Quran with a translation in your native language. Understanding the meaning of what you are listening to is priceless.

3. Fast during the first 9 days of Dhul-Hijjah; in particular, the ninth day:

The Prophet used to fast on the ninth of Dhu’l-Hijjah and related that fasting the ten days is the equivalent of fasting a year, and standing in prayer at night (for the ten nights) is the equivalent of standing on the night of Qadr [at-Tirmidhi].

Fasting is also a splendid way to increase your good deeds. Allah says:

“All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him, except for fasting, which is for Me, and I am the One Who will reward him for it” [Bukhari].

Fasting doesn’t require of you any extra time. In fact, when you fast, you actually provide yourself with more time, as you are not occupied preparing and eating meals.

4. Turn off the TV:

This click of the button is another marvelous  way to free yourself up for more time to worship your Lord. It’s also an outstanding way to minimize the negative and harmful influences that you and your children are exposed to when sitting down under its trance. The first 10 days of Dhul-Hijjah present a grand opportunity for you and your children to renounce the TV habit. Of course, wherever there’s a void, there must be a replacement. How about replacing TV time with family conversations, book readings, crafts, word games, animal documentaries, or Islamic-related DVDs? Research the Internet for more TV-free ideas.

5. Remind your children to supplicate to Allah for what they want:

What a simple way to get blessings – asking Allah to bestow His blessings upon us is a form of worship. How Great Allah is! In our interactions with others, we get blessings for giving to others. But when relating to our Lord, we get rewarded for asking of Him.

6. Be patient with your children and family members during these special days:

Being kind to your loved ones can earn you many blessings, insha’Allah. There are numerous hadith encouraging us toward benevolent behavior. Consideration towards family members doesn’t necessitate extra time–only genuine effort.  Even a smile is charity according to a famous hadith. Keep in mind, one of the best ways your children learn is by example. Let them know you are working on your patience this beloved month – your good example will go a long way toward inspiring your children to engage in benevolent behavior with others, as well.

There are numerous ways you and your children can strive to be productive spiritually during these first 10 days of Dhul Hijjah. Try putting into practice as many of the above mentioned points as you can.  Don’t allow such a grand opportunity to receive Allah’s pleasure and blessings pass you by.

The post Dhul Hijjah: Our Other Exceptional Month appeared first on ProductiveMuslim.com.